How Far?
by AkayaKirihara
Summary: In this one shot, discover how far Eiji will go for his toothpaste. Not the greatest but I was writing my slightly darker  ok maybe not slightly  fic and I wanted to cheer myself up and this is the result! Enjoy because I know I did when writing this!


**Just a fun one shot about Eiji and his toothbrush/paste fetish. Ahhh, I love Eiji! 3 Hope you enjoy this!**

A horrified shriek rang through the Kikumaru residence, startling both neighbours and the actual members of the household as Eiji Kikumaru of Seigaku ran out of the bathroom, clad in nothing but a fluffy white towel slung low over his hips.

"Okaaasan!" He tripped down the stairs, squishing his sister (_I know he has lots of siblings but that's about it) _against the wall as he rushed downstairs. "Mou, where's my toothpaste!"

A kind looking but weary lady turned away from the counter where she was cooking lunch for her rather large family. "Eiji, I told you yesterday that your father had to go on an emergency business trip and so he took yours because it was the nearest one."

Disheartened, the boy flopped down in a chair. Depression was clearly on his face as he stared moodily at his mother, his chin jutted out in a stubborn pout.

"Oh Eiji, you know that face doesn't work on me. Just brush your teeth with one of your sibling's paste and then you can go out to buy some new toothpaste later."

Mrs. Kikumaru rapped him on the head with a pair of chopsticks before turning back to the oven, shaking her head at her youngest son's antics. Was toothpaste really that important?

Eiji just huffed and stomped back upstairs, moaning when he saw that his sisters had taken over the bathroom as soon as he vacated it.

"Why does life have to be so cruel?"

"Because life hates you Eiji-kun," a feminine voice giggled from inside the bathroom. "Oh and by the way, I accidently dropped your toothbrush in the toilet. You may want to get a new one."

"NII-SAN!" Eiji practically exploded, slamming the door to his room with a bang. Angrily he jumped on his bed, punching a few pillows before he jumped off and began to pace. Muttering to himself, he quickly donned a pair of shades, put on some clothes and shimmied out through his bedroom window.

"_I'm going to get some toothpaste even if it kills me," Eiji thought determinedly._

…

Still in his rather "clever" disguise, the boy strolled casually down the street to the local corner store, not expecting Oishi to be walking around town that morning too.

"Ah! Eiji is that you?" Oishi waved from across the street. "I wanna show you something!"

He looked both ways cautiously before crossing the street at a jog. "Yo, Eiji! The pet shop just got a new supply of fish and one of mine died recently so I'm thinking of getting a new one. Could you help me choose?"

Eiji sweatdropped nervously. He hadn't expected his disguise to fail. "Uh, Oishi I would usually love too but…"

"Great! Thanks Eiji! You're the best y'know?"

Eiji sighed. How could he refuse his beloved doubles partner now?

…

Oishi dragged Eiji through the aisles till they reached the back where they shop held their more interesting types of fish.

"You see Eiji, I kind of want to change up my tank a bit so I thought why not get one of these. They're so cute too!" Oishi gushed, nose pressed up against the glass of the fish tank while Eiji just stared on in horror. Of all the fish out there, Oishi had to pick the ugliest fish Eji had ever seen. It was a murky brown with toady eyes and the sharpest teeth imaginable. Why would a fish even need teeth like that?

"Er, its really great Oishi. Just adorable really." Inwardly he apologized to all of Oishi's current fish. That monster fish would probable eat them all.

Happily Oishi turned around. "You think so too? Thanks so much for your help Eiji!"

Still glancing at the fish in revulsion, Eiji slowly inched his way away. "Eheheh, no problem Oishi! I just gotta go now!"

With that he ran off, the only evidence that he had even been there, being the light tinkling of the store bell.

…

"Hoi, hoi! Now its time to find my toothpaste!"

He entered the store cheerily but stopped in shock when he looked at the available brands of toothpaste. Alarmed, Eji dashed up to the counter.

"Where is the Chocolate's signature toothpaste brand?"

The man regarded him strangely from under his busy eyebrows before pointing to a receding silhouette. "That boy bought the last tube," he muttered.

"Ah jeez!"

With that, Eji was gone in a flash, chasing the person who looked oddly familiar.

"Tezuka?" Flabbergasted that his captain even used such a type of toothpaste brand seemed to shock the poor boy into silence while Tezuka fidgeted uncomfortably.

"Yes Eiji?" The stoic captain asked. He had really been hoping that would be able to just quickly nab the toothpaste for his mother than run back and pretend he had never even looked at such girly toothpaste let alone buy it. If anyone knew his reputation would be ruined!

"Why are you? W-hy? Why are you buying THE CHOCOLATE'S signature toothpaste brand!"

"Its for my mother." Tezuka quickly grumbled, eager to clear his name of any charges that Eiji may have come up with. However, it seemed as if Tezuka and his reputation would be safe for today as all Eiji had eyes for was the toothpaste swinging enticingly in the bag that Tezuka held in his hands.

"Oh…"

Eiji twitched, his inner angel fighting a loosing battle with his need for toothpaste. He began to grow twitchy and Tezuka stepped back as soon as he noticed that.

"Are you ok Eiji?"

"Y-yeah. Of course!" Eiji squeaked out. Then the unimaginable happened, at least unimaginable for Tezuka. In a flash, Eiji had shoved a wad of bills in Tezuka's face and had run off with the toothpaste in his hands.

Eagerly, he sniffed its delicious aroma as he ran back home, glad that he had overcome his stamina problem.

"Finally you're mine," he mumbled happily.

When he arrived back home he sneakily crept inside but his mother was right at the door as soon as he got in. Quickly hiding the bag of toothpaste he had "stolen" from Tezuka he smiled innocently up at his mother.

She smiled back at him and then presented him with a pack of toothpastes and brushes, all Chocolate themed.

"Its for you Eiji since I knew how disappointed you were about not having your favourite brand. You like it right?"

Suddenly Eiji found that all the colour in his face had drained away. His vision seemed to flicker and he could hear himself making unintelligible noises similar to that of a dying fish out of water.

"Tezuka. Stole. Toothpaste. Murdered. Never going back. Goodbye life."

With that he fainted right there, images of Tezuka pelting him with tennis balls dancing through his head.


End file.
